Fantastic Mr. Fox Quotes

Mrs. Fox: I'm going to lose my temper now.
Mr. Fox: When?
Mrs. Fox: Right now.
Mr. Fox: Well, when...
[Mrs Fox slashes his face]
Mr. Fox: OW!
Mrs. Fox: Twelve fox years ago, you made a promise to me, while we were caged inside that fox trap, that if we

survived, you would never steal another chicken, turkey, goose, duck, or a squab - whatever they are, and I believed you. Why? Why did you lie to me?
Mr. Fox: Because I'm a wild animal.
Mrs. Fox: You are also a husband and a father.
Mr. Fox: I'm trying to tell you the truth about myself.
Mrs. Fox: I

don't care about the truth about yourself. This story is too predictable.
Mr. Fox: Predictable? Really? What happens in the end?
Mrs. Fox: In the end, we all die. Unless you change.

Badger: In summation, I think you just got to not do it, man. That's all.
Mr. Fox: I understand what you're saying, and your comments are valuable, but I'm gonna ignore your advice.
Badger: The cuss you are.
Mr. Fox: The cuss am I? Are you cussing with me?
Badger: No, you cussing with

me?
Mr. Fox: Don't cussing point at me!
Badger: If you're gonna cuss with somebody, you're not gonna cuss with me, you little cuss!
Mr. Fox: You're not gonna cuss with me!
[Both start snarling at each other, and then settle down]
Mr. Fox: Just buy the tree.
Badger: Okay.

Mr. Fox: They say all foxes are slightly allergic to linoleum, but it's cool to the paw - try it. They say my tail needs to be dry cleaned twice a month, but now it's fully detachable - see? They say our tree may never grow back, but one day, something will. Yes, these crackles are made of synthetic goose and these giblets come from artificial squab and even these apples look fake

- but at least they've got stars on them. I guess my point is, we'll eat tonight, and we'll eat together. And even in this not particularly flattering light, you are without a doubt the five and a half most wonderful wild animals I've ever met in my life. So let's raise our boxes - to our survival.

Mr. Fox: [sighs] Who am I, Kylie?
Kylie: Who how? What now?
Mr. Fox: Why a fox? Why not a horse, or a beetle, or a bald eagle? I'm saying this more as, like, existentialism, you know? Who am I? And how can a fox ever be happy without, you'll forgive the expression, a chicken in its teeth?
Kylie: I don't know

what you're talking about, but it sounds illegal.

Beaver's Son: [lays down a box of supplies during a Science lab class] Why's your cousin such a wet sandwich?
Kristofferson: I beg your pardon?
Beaver's Son: What's that mean?
Kristofferson: That means that I don't understand what you just said. A wet sandwich?
Beaver's Son: Yeah! A wet

sandwich. He's too short, he dresses like a girl, he's
[makes a motion with his hands]
Beaver's Son: different.
Kristofferson: Are you a bully? You're starting to sound like a bully.
Beaver's Son: Watch this.
[he takes a spoonful of yellow powder and drops it into the bubbling liquid over a Bunsen burner; it

explodes and covers both of them in the yellow substance]
Kristofferson: That's... you just destroyed the whole experiment. We'd better extinguish this magnesium.
[they raise their safety goggles]
Kristofferson: Stand back.
[Kris sprays the fire with an extinguisher]
Agnes: [watching from a few feet away] Wow.

Kristofferson: [whistles] Whew!
Agnes: [to Kris] Hmm. I like your ears.
[gestures to her own]
Kristofferson: M... Mine?
Agnes: Mmhmm.
Kristofferson: Thank you! I like your... spots.
Agnes: Really? I used to cover them up, but, you know...

Ash: Ugh.
[scoffs]
Agnes: Hmm?
Ash: You're supposed to be *my* lab partner.
Agnes: I am!
Ash: No you're not. You're disloyal.

[Coach Skip is teaching Kristofferson the rules of Whackbat]
Coach Skip: Basically, there's three grabbers, three taggers, five twig runners, and a player at Whackbat. Center tagger lights a pine cone and chucks it over the basket and the whack-batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross rock. Then the twig runners dash back and forth until the pine cone burns out and

the umpire calls hotbox. Finally, you count up however many score-downs it adds up to and divide that by nine.
Kristofferson: Got it.

Mr. Fox: [Mr. Fox on a motorcycle speaking to a wolf off on a distant ridge] Where did you come from?
Mr. Fox: What are you doing here?
Mr. Fox: I don't think he speaks English or Latin
Mr. Fox: Pensez-vous que l'hiver sera rude?
Mr. Fox: [as an aside to Ash, Kris, and Kylie in the

motorcycle] I'm asking if he thinks we're in for a hard winter.
Mr. Fox: I have a phobia of wolves.
Mr. Fox: What a beautiful creature.
Mr. Fox: [as an aside to Ash, Kris, and Kyle in the motorcycle] Wish him luck boys.

Mrs. Fox: [sees her husband, Kris and Kylie sneaking through the kitchen] Another book party?
Mr. Fox: [surprised] Oh! I didn't see you sitting in the dark over there.
[grins sheepishly]
Mr. Fox: Yeah! No actually, there's a fire. I just got the call; they said maybe it's arson. I've got to interview the marshal and see if

it's...
Mrs. Fox: [turns on the light] Kylie, is he telling the truth?
Kylie: I... I don't want to be put into the middle of this!
Mr. Fox: Thanks, Kylie.
Mrs. Fox: Why is he wearing that bandit hat?
[points at Kris, wearing a bandit hat]
Mr. Fox: His ears were cold. He's

not with us.
[to Kris]
Mr. Fox: Go back to bed.
[Kris leaves and closes the door]
Mrs. Fox: If what I think is happening, IS happening... it better not be.

Beaver's Son: We don't like you and we hate your dad. Now grab some of that mud, chew it in your mouth, and swallow it.
Ash: I'm not gonna eat mud!
Beaver's Son: Cuss yeah you are.
[he picks up a large glob of mud and shoves it in Ash's face. Ash makes a gagging sound but does not react further]

Kristofferson: [takes off his shoes] Don't do that.
Beaver's Son: Why'd you take your shoes off?
Kristofferson: So I don't break your nose when I kick it.
[he proceeds to take Beaver's son out with some precision karate moves, ending with a throwdown in the mud. Beaver's son walks away quietly sobbing]

Ash: I can fight my own fights.
Kristofferson: [turns to Ash] No you can't...

Ash: [Mr. Fox has just lost his tail in the shooting] It'll grow back, won't it?
Kylie: Tails don't grow back.
Ash: Tails don't grow back?
Kylie: Uh-uh. 'Cept for lizards.
Mr. Fox: Tails don't grow back. I'm gonna be tail-less for the rest of my life.
Ash: Well,

anyway, it's not half as bad as double pneumonia, right? I mean his dad's got one foot in the grave and three feet on a banana peel. That's a lot worse than just a...
Kristofferson: [ricochets an acorn around the room, which lands in the teacup he is holding] Excuse me, everyone. I'm gonna go meditate for half an hour.
[exits quickly]
Mrs.

Fox: [to Ash] You have got twenty-nine minutes to come up with a proper apology.
Ash: Me? ME have an apology? He gets a bandit hat? He just got here, and he gets a bandit hat? Where's MY bandit hat? Why didn't I get shot at? It's because, you... you... you think I'm no good at anything! Well, maybe you're right, thanks.
[stomps away angrily and slams door

upon exit]
Kylie: [to Mr. Fox] Told ya not to bring him.